The Rogue’s Redemption Read online

  He’d spent the past two days attempting to speak to her, but it seemed his past transgressions would not allow for an opening. If Allie considered herself stubborn, she was entirely compliant compared with her sister.

  Gillian simply did not like him.

  He knew he’d acted like a bit of an arse when they first met. He’d been annoyed at her now-husband for his lack of action against English raiders. It was de Sowlis land that had been raided, after all, and an innocent woman had lost her life. He would have preferred for Graeme to react more strongly, though he should have expected the clan chief’s tempered response. It was the way the man approached everything.

  Reid was brought back to the present—yet another meeting with the Lord Warden and the border chiefs—when a bout of screaming ended with Douglas slamming his fist on the table and the chief of Clan MacDuff threatening to leave before they reached an accord. Someone called for a break, and Reid used it as an opportunity to seek out the lady of Highgate Castle. He found her just outside the kitchen on the path toward the great keep, where the evening meal was already being prepared.

  “Lady Gillian, a word?”

  When she turned to look at him, her resemblance to Allie caught him off guard. He didn’t always see it, and not just because Gillian had freckles whereas her sister did not. They carried themselves so differently—while Gillian had the carriage of a proper lady, the kind who cared about appearances and would never, ever consider fighting with a longsword, Allie was much freer in her movements. More spirited.

  “I’m sorry,” she said, walking past him. “There is much to be done before the—”

  “I’ve offended you.”

  It was not a question, and they both knew it.

  When Gillian stopped and looked at him, as if cataloguing his flaws, he felt less confident that he’d be able to make good on his promise to Allie. This was the first time Gillian had acknowledged him directly since the start of the council, and Reid almost wished she had not done so.

  “I apologize for the first evening we met, at The Wild Boar.”

  “Apology accepted.” Her tone told him just the opposite. With those few curt words, she turned her back to him and walked away.

  He thought about going after her, but decided to wait until the meal.

  Someone whistled. “I’ve never seen her quite like this before.”

  Aidan. He’d just come from the kitchen and had a fresh-baked loaf in his hands.

  “Attempting to make amends with Lady Gillian?” He tore off a hunk of bread, a good-natured smile firmly in place, and handed it to him.

  Reid accepted the offering.

  They stood there for a moment, eating the bread and watching as servants picked herbs and vegetables and visitors wandered the expansive courtyard. It struck Reid that it had been some time since Brockburg Castle had seen this many guests. Lady Juliette had done much to revive a home that had become little more than a place to eat and train after his father’s death.

  “Attempting, though not succeeding,” Reid finally said.

  “Why?”

  The question startled him.

  “I know you, Kerr, and you’re not one for idle conversation. Or for caring much for the opinion of others.”

  Reid feigned surprise. “You wound me, de Sowlis.”

  The other man would not be so easily deterred. “You did not answer my question.”

  Nor would he. Reid had agreed to keep his arrangement with Allie a private matter until her sister could be swayed. Which he absolutely needed to do. Although he’d told Allie her family’s consent did not matter to him, he had since reconsidered. Clan Scott were their allies, and moreover, de Sowlis and his brother agreed with the Kerrs on how best to handle the current border disputes—by removing the new English warden from his position. He didn’t wish to be the one to destroy that.

  “It irks me that a woman, any woman, has such a strong reaction to me.” Which was, at least, partially true.

  “And Allie?”

  He could not give up any more information. “Is quite good with the longsword.”

  “I saw you together two evenings ago.”

  Outside the castle walls? Had the guard told him? Or—

  “Dancing.” Aidan finished the last bite of warm bread in his hand, smiling at Reid as if they shared a secret.

  Reid was beginning to lose patience with the man’s insinuations. “If you have something to say, de Sowlis, say it.”

  Aidan did not appear to be in a hurry to do so. He took his time chewing, then shrugged. “Very well.” Squaring his shoulders, he crossed his arms. “We’ve had this discussion before, but it seems as if a repetition is warranted. If your intentions with Allie are not honorable—”

  “We did have this very discussion.”

  “Aye, but then I had nothing but a suspicion.”

  “About?”

  “Allie’s feelings toward you. As I said before, I know you to be an honorable man—”

  “De Sowlis—”

  “I’ve spent quite a bit of time with Allie, as you know. I’ve seen her in the company of men more powerful and”—Aidan grinned—“much handsomer than you. I have eyes, Kerr, and knew immediately there was something between you. Despite everything . . . I like you. It would be a good match—for you, for Allie, and for our clans.”

  “You encouraged it by allowing me to train her.” Reid should have suspected as much from the start, but he had been too enamored with Allie to question why the man would have given over her training so easily.

  “Graeme may not agree, and certainty Gillian does not. She genuinely does not like you.”

  “But how did you know—”

  “Though her words may have said otherwise, the truth of Allie’s feelings show whenever she is around you. As I said, I only knew for sure when I saw you dancing in the hall. I can tell you care for her, so the question now is . . . why are you hiding your affection?”

  He’d not lie directly to Aidan, his ally, and the man who would be his brother-in-law.

  “Lady Gillian.”

  Aidan waited for him to explain.

  “Allie wants her sister to like me—”

  A harsh laugh cut him off. “So we will not be allied as family after all.”

  He ignored that. “And, of course, your brother—”

  “Do not worry about Graeme. He knows you as I do.”

  Precisely the cause for his concern. “And that recommends me to him?”

  Aidan clasped his shoulder. “You are not all bad, Kerr. If you were, we would not be having this conversation. Though I will admit, I don’t understand your position in the clan. You belong by Toren’s side as his—”

  “Do not.” His voice was low, hard. A warning.

  Aidan dropped his hand.

  “We were discussing Allie—”

  “Who will be a member of your clan,” Aidan pointed out.

  Reid remained silent, knowing Aidan would not drop the matter.

  “When Alex moved to Dunmure, I thought surely—”

  “I want it,” he spat out, anger and resentment oozing from the words. What the hell was wrong with him? He’d never said those words aloud. First he’d opened his heart to Allie, and now he was unburdening himself to Aidan de Sowlis, a man that had been his enemy once. Or, more precisely, a man whose father had been an enemy to his own. Reid had never taken issue with either de Sowlis brother. He would have dropped the feud long ago, but his brother had remained stubborn, unnecessarily dragging out their clans’ enmity.

  It took a moment for Aidan to recover, and the look of surprise on his face was keen enough for Reid to regret his words. “Then take it.”

  He shook his head. “You don’t understand.”

  “You’re wrong,” Aidan said. “I understand more than most. Do you forget I am the younger brother of Graeme de Sowlis?”

  Reid frowned. “Alex was—”

  “Toren’s second. And you should replace him now,” Aidan said
, his voice firm.

  I could never replace Alex. His brother always makes the right decision and never questions himself.

  He could not discuss this now. “Let it go, Aidan.”

  As they watched, the clan leaders who had ventured outside began to make their way back into the keep.

  “It appears another round of shouting and fist pounding is about to commence,” he said, not looking forward to the remainder of the afternoon.

  “And some hoped this would be over in a matter of days.”

  Reid glanced back toward the kitchen. “I hope Highgate is prepared for us.”

  The cost of hosting so many guests for an extended period would be substantial.

  “We are prepared,” Aidan said as they walked toward the keep. “But, more importantly, are you prepared for Lady Gillian?”

  Reid would have said yes once, but he’d begun to doubt everything he thought he knew about himself.

  “I am,” he lied. “And will do whatever it takes to win her to my side.” That was the truth. For Allie, he would do anything.

  * * *

  “I refuse.”

  Allie wanted him to show her more advanced maneuvers, but she simply wasn’t ready.

  “Do you know how long I’ve practiced this? Most take years to get this—”

  “You are still holding back.”

  They faced each other, swords drawn, repeating the same movements over and over. Reid understood her frustration, but he would not allow her impatience to get her injured.

  “Besides”—he drew back and tossed his sword to the side—“your grip is slipping. If you don’t get that right, you cannot advance.”

  He moved to stand behind her. Though he could just as easily explain what she needed to do, he’d not touched her once this session. Reaching around her waist, he moved her hand lower on the weapon.

  “As you swing, your hand continues to slide away from the end of the hilt. Keep it here, like this.”

  Her hair, always braided during their training, tickled his nose as he leaned closer. He took a deep breath, allowing himself the distraction. “I would wake up every day to this smell.”

  Allie lowered her sword as he moved his hands to her waist and pulled her to him. When he placed a soft kiss on her neck, she sighed breathily, then said, “Is this part of the training?”

  “Hmmm.” Reid allowed his hands to move upward, and though he knew how quickly he could lose control, how easily he seemed to do so whenever she was near, he couldn’t help himself.

  Days had passed since their secret betrothal, and other than their training sessions, he had to make do with quick kisses and exchanged glances. Given the opportunity to touch her at will, Reid was simply not strong enough to resist.

  “Your training in this area will be much more . . . intense soon.” His hands moved upward, cupping her breasts. The thin material of her shirt was hardly a barrier and very much a threat to his control. “It unfortunately must wait until after the wedding, though I will admit, it will not be an easy task.”

  Wedding.

  He was actually planning to take this woman as his wife. He’d never thought he could look upon such an event with anticipation. Nay, eagerness. If he was scared, it was only because he was most assuredly not worthy of such a woman.

  “I don’t deserve you,” he murmured against her neck.

  Planting the tip of the sword into the ground in front of her, Allie gave herself to him completely. She leaned back against him, a soft moan escaping her lips as Reid moved on from her neck, trailing the gentlest of kisses upward.

  “You underestimate yourself,” she said. The tug in his chest warred with the one against his breeks as he pressed up against her. The sensation of his fully hardened cock making contact with Allie’s backside, separated only by a few thin layers of fabric, threatened the promise he’d made to himself.

  He had nearly killed his brother-in-law for taking his sister’s virginity before they wed—he would not be fool enough to make that same mistake. They could wait.

  He could wait.

  Or could he?

  “Though a wee bit of early training—”

  “Allie!”

  Reid let go of her so quickly she nearly fell. He’d reached for his sword before he even realized the voice was a woman’s.

  Gillian’s, to be precise.

  Allie’s sister stood much too close. How had he not heard her approaching? Reid had never been so careless before. He had never seen Gillian look anything but proper, although that might be because he’d never seen her this angry before. Her chest rose and fell with heaving breaths, her eyes flashed at Allie.

  “What are you about?” she demanded.

  Reid restrained himself from answering, knowing she would not be pleased with any response from him.

  “You.” Her eyes narrowed. “You are despicable—”

  “Nay, Gillian, do not.”

  “My sister is not some tavern wench you can mishandle, Reid Kerr.” She spat his name out as if it were an epithet. “Get away from her.”

  “Gill,” Allie admonished her sister, her hands visibly shaking as she stood by his side. He had the urge to grab her hand and steady it, to let her know that Gillian’s words affected him only because they upset her. But he didn’t dare.

  “What could you have been . . .” Gillian finally looked down toward Allie’s other hand “Is that a sword?”

  He expected Allie to attempt to explain. To show her sister some of the fire she so often showed him. Instead, a single tear dropped down her cheek.

  Reid hated seeing her so defeated. His Allie was a warrior.

  “Allie . . .” He could not allow her to be in such pain without showing her—

  “Do not touch her.”

  He looked back and forth between the sisters. Though he knew Gillian did not care for him, he was surprised by the vehemence of her words. “Lady Gillian, I can assure you—”

  “And I can assure you, if you dare lay another hand on my sister, you will no longer be welcome here at Highgate End. Leave us.”

  He would not engage with Lady Gillian now, but he couldn’t bear to leave Allie alone with her.

  Allie must have seen the indecision in his eyes.

  “I will be fine, Reid. Go,” she said.

  He hesitated, but this was her sister. Reid reminded himself Gillian was only trying to protect her sister.

  He nodded, holding out his hand for the sword, which she gave him. As for Gillian . . . “My lady, we need to discuss—”

  “I do not wish to speak with you. Now or ever. Perhaps I did not make myself clear earlier. Or let me say it a bit differently. ‘I would not presume to discuss such matters now.’”

  It took him a moment to understand, but the mocking tone quickly brought him back to their first meeting. He’d said those words to Graeme at The Wild Boar, not wanting to be overheard by the tavern’s patrons. But Lady Gillian had clearly taken it to mean he did not wish to speak openly in front of her, a woman.

  “You are mistaken, my lady. I did not mean—”

  “Did you mean to take the barmaid to your bed?” she mocked. “Surely I did not mistake your intentions with that woman in The Wild Boar.”

  Reid tried to remain calm, but she was beginning to provoke him.

  “Nay,” he said. “You did not.” He gripped the hilt of Allie’s sword tightly. “I took her to my bed.”

  Reid heard Allie’s gasp behind him as he walked away, and though he was immediately sorry for the hard words, he did not take them back.

  Not only had he failed to endear himself to Gillian, but Allie was no doubt furious with him as well. The last thing he heard was Gillian saying, “You have much to explain.”

  12

  Allie was shaking.

  Angry with both her sister and Reid, she sunk deeper into the wooden tub, determined not to get out until the water turned cold. With so many guests in attendance, Allie would not normally have asked for a bath to
be brought to her chamber. But she needed time alone. She’d already asked Morgan to bring her meal to her.

  Gillian had not been happy, of course, but Allie would not be swayed.

  Morgan had left a washing cloth and bar of rose-scented soap on a stool next to the tub. She picked up both items and began to wash, attempting to cleanse away the entire afternoon. The memories clung to her, resistant to her efforts.

  She’d tried to explain her training to Gillian, who of course did not understand. More importantly, her sister refused to even discuss the matter of Reid. And when Gillian pointed to his parting words as evidence of the man’s character, Allie had not known what to say.

  The words had been harsh.

  They’d come from the same man who’d propositioned her outside this tower.

  The one who looked at others as if they lived to serve his pleasure. The one who did not appear to care about anything or anyone. Who wielded words as weapons just as sharp as the swords with which the men trained.

  Reid had said that this man was a part of him, and here was her evidence, but she knew it was not the sum of him.

  Aye, as Gillian had been quick to remind her, she had been sheltered at Lyndwood. Her sister might be right—she knew little of the world and of men. And yet . . .

  I know that Reid looks at me differently than anyone else. And that he cares for me.

  “Ahh,” she groaned when the door opened behind her. “Not yet, Morgan.”

  She’d not expected the maid so soon. She must have gone straight to the kitchen, for the meal could not have already begun.

  “I’ve just begun to wash.”

  “Then allow me to assist you.”

  Allie spun around so quickly the water splashed all around her and onto the floor.

  “Reid! What are you—”

  He pulled the stool out next to the tub and sat on it as if he were a king . . . the stool, his throne.

  “You cannot . . .” She looked down at the murky water. A white sheen hid all but her shoulders and arms. When Allie glanced back up, the look in Reid’s eyes sent a shiver down her spine despite the warmth of the water.

  “Your maid said that you did not plan on attending the evening meal.”